Round 1 2023: Quotes

[hwarium]

Status: Closed This round has closed. It remains open for fills, comments and remixes, but prompts are no longer accepted. Seventeen Holidays Round 1: Quotes About "Someone will remember us, I say, even in another time." "How inconvenient to be made of desire." "It's me, hi, I'm the problem its me." Calling all readers, lovers of poetry and music, screen and stage. Quote collecters and lyric hoarders, unleash your archive. For this round, every prompt must contain a quote - you can combine them, add commentary, link to articles, do whatever. Steal from a literary classic, or copy WeVerse drama. 🛑 HOLD UP If this is your first time on 17hols please check out our About Page which contains helpful information and links to pages explaining dreamwidth and HTML. We are a prompting fest where all the action happens in the comment section. Rules Sign up is not required. Fills have a minimum of 400 words for prose, haiku-length for poetry (3 lines), and 400px by 400px for art (memes are also art). Other mediums are fine too! There is no maximum cap. Tag and provide content warnings at your discretion, but a good guide are the Ao3 four (Graphic Depictions of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage) and this list of common CWs (cr: SportsFest). NSFW/Explicit content should be tagged NSFW art should not be visible, please provide a link and a warning. You may crop the artwork and embed a SFW preview. How it works Prompting Click on [Post a New Comment] at the bottom of this post; Change the subject; Copy+Paste the following HTML into your comment and edit the sections. Feel free to add as much detail as you want! Need ideas? Check out our 2021 and 2022 Quote rounds. <strong>Ship/Member:</strong> Any <strong>Major Tags:</strong> N/A <strong>Additional Tags:</strong> N/A <strong>Do Not Wants:</strong> None <strong>Prompt:</strong> <blockquote>[QUOTE GOES HERE] </blockquote> Filling Reply to the original prompt; You must change the subject to [FILL] - this is to help the mods track. Feel free to add a title Copy+Paste the following HTML into your comment, edit the sections, and add your text. You may also upload your fill to the AO3 Collection. <strong>Ship/Member:</strong> Any <strong>Major Tags:</strong> N/A <strong>Additional Tags:</strong> N/A <strong>Permission to remix:</strong> Yes/No/Please ask *** Remixing Post as a reply to the fill you are remixing, using the same HTML as above; Change the subject to [REMIX]. Art/media Upload your work to any platform (twitter, imgur, youtube, soundcloud, google maps, etc.) Using the same HTML code as above, copy the link into your fill or remix. That's it! Optionally, you can embed a picture into your comment. Please use the following code instead. (To explain, the HTML resizes your picture to 400x400px so that it fits on most screens. Users can view the full size if they click on it. You can also add a link to your work on twitter so that others can share it, or to any other website you want) <strong>Ship/Member:</strong> Any <strong>Major Tags:</strong> N/A <strong>Additional Tags:</strong> N/A <strong>Permission to remix:</strong> Yes/No/Please ask *** <img src="INSERT IMAGE URL" width="400px"> <a href="INSERT ANY URL YOU WANT">TEXT THAT DESCRIBES THE LINK</a> Note! On dreamwidth, you can't edit a comment once someone has replied to it. Navigation ABOUT FAQ CHAT BAITS ✧ FILLS ✧ < ROUND 1: QUOTES > ROUND 2: ALTERNATE UNIVERSES 2021 2022

Comments

Re: [FILL] bones and all

[thisisrose]

This is so special, I am thinking so many thoughts wow

Re: [FILL] let it be me

[paperbuffet]

Ten chefs kisses. Twenty, even. He loves him. Crazy how he leans over customers to help with his computers and thinks of him, then goes back to their shared apartment where everything is set up for their life as a married couple, toothbrushes and all!
Really adored the way you captured their relationship as well as their characters. Soonyoung wouldn't keep falling out of bed if he had someone holding him every morning when he woke up!! Just a suggestion, your honour...

[FILL] what kind of love

[soupblog]

Ship/Member: gyuhan
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: idolverse, friends and idiots to lovers, first kisses, confessions, seungkwan the meddler, jeonghan who lies for fun and mingyu who couldn't lie to save his life
Permission to remix: Please ask

***

“Hyung, how do you really feel about me?” Mingyu asks.

It’s a silly question, Jeonghan thinks, but second of all– it’s not a yes or no question. Someone, probably Seungcheol, reminds Mingyu of this and he whines, saying it doesn’t matter. But he rephrases it anyway.

“Hyung,” Mingyu tries again. “Hyung, do you love me?”

The members giggle and laugh, and yeah, it’s funny, it’s supposed to be funny– but Jeonghan feels like he’s going to die. Why couldn’t Mingyu just have asked him something stupid, like ‘did you shower this morning’, or something like that? Why did Mingyu have to be so… Mingyu, about it?

“No,” Jeonghan says flatly, drawing more laughter from the members.

Mingyu huffs and rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. Good, okay, this is fine. Now comes the hard part– the part where the guy reading the polygraph says Jeonghan is lying.

“True,” the polygraph reader says.

“What?” Jeonghan says, quite involuntarily. He stares at the polygrapher wide eyed.

The other members are laughing, but Mingyu’s stopped; his expression is suddenly impassive. He looks at Jeonghan and Jeonghan doesn’t know what he sees.

New talent for his resume, Jeonghan supposes. He can pass a polygraph while lying.

The rest of the interview passes in sort of a blur– Jeonghan doesn’t listen to any of the questions or the answers being dealt out until it’s Mingyu’s turn to sit in the chair. They exchange a heated look when they accidentally make eye contact, and Mingyu doesn’t look angry, he just looks a bit sad. It would be better if he was angry, Jeonghan thinks.

“Mingyu,” Seungkwan says, with the air of someone who’s just had the best idea in their entire career. “Do you love Jeonghan hyung?”

Oh. Jeonghan looks over at Mingyu, who’s staring at Seungkwan with barely masked fury, obviously trying very hard to tame his emotions and hide them from the camera.

“No,” Mingyu says, the annoyance hidden by his joking tone, but not well enough that they don’t all know he’s lying.

“False,” the polygraph reader says.

Laughter, again. Mingyu doesn’t laugh though. He’s looking at Jeonghan like he’s trying to blow him up with his mind.

After the last two members have taken their turn in the chair, the interview ends. Mingyu stalks off, and Minghao follows him, and Jeonghan stands there staring after them until they disappear from sight. He wants to say something to Mingyu, but he’s not sure what. “I’m sorry” maybe, or “wasn’t that funny? How I lied and got away with it?”

Because Jeonghan was lying, of course he was lying– he’s sure everyone else knew he was lying too. Even Mingyu. Right? Didn’t he know? What was this about?

The car trip back to the dorms is bad. Mingyu and Jeonghan end up in the same car, Mingyu in the front seat, Jeonghan in the back, the silence between them thick and heavy. The other members either don’t notice or don’t mention it. Jeonghan doesn’t know why, he doesn’t know what the silence means, he doesn’t know why Mingyu insists on ignoring him.

When they get inside the building Mingyu still doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even look at him. He sulks by himself till Wonwoo comes over to him and puts an arm around his shoulders, and then they’re off to their shared dorm, and Jeonghan is left alone.

Seungkwan comes to find him in the kitchen an hour later.

“Hyung,” he says. “I’m… I’m sorry.”

“About what?”

“You know,” Seungkwan says, gesturing vaguely. “You and Mingyu. I didn’t mean to make things weird, I was just trying to make it a funny interview, but I… I crossed a line.”

What line, though? Jeonghan chews on the inside of his cheek, staring back at Seungkwan. He wants to ask, he’s dying to ask, but he’s stubborn and hates asking for help. He’ll figure it out himself.

“It’s okay,” Jeonghan says at length. “You did a good job today, Seungkwan-ah. I know you put a lot of pressure on yourself to appear funny and happy in interviews, and to make stuff fun for people to watch.”

“Hyung,” Seungkwan whines, flushing slightly at the comments. “You’re being gross. I wasn’t fishing for compliments.”

“I know,” Jeonghan laughs. “I just wanted to compliment you, is that so bad?”

“Yes,” Seungkwan huffs. He walks over to the fridge and opens it, grabbing two beers and sliding one across the counter to Jeonghan. “You should probably talk to Mingyu.”

“What?”

“He looked sad,” Seungkwan says, shrugging. “You know how he is sometimes.”

“But it was a joke,” Jeonghan says, and he’s trying to convince himself more than he’s trying to convince Seungkwan– he’s trying to make it make sense. If Seungkwan says it makes sense, then maybe he’ll be able to believe it. “Of course I love Mingyu. It wasn’t funny because I don’t love him, it was funny because I managed to pass a polygraph test while lying.”

“I know that,” Seungkwan says, waving a hand. “You love all the members. But you know… well, love can be different things between different people. Maybe he meant a different kind of love.”

Huh? Jeonghan sits there and stares at Seungkwan, who looks casual and collected, like what he’d said hadn’t been insane. Seungkwan takes a sip of his beer. Jeonghan is seeing colors he’s never seen before.

A different kind of love? Like what? What did it mean? He wants to ask Seungkwan what he means, but he gets the feeling Seungkwan isn’t going to answer. So instead he downs the rest of his beer, and he stands up.

“I’m going to bed,” Jeonghan declares.

“Okay,” Seungkwan says. “Tell Mingyu I said hi.”

Jeonghan doesn’t dignify this with a response, he just scoffs and leaves the kitchen– and he leaves their dorm, and he takes the elevator up to the floor where Mingyu and Wonwoo live. He wonders what they’re doing. Maybe they’re talking about him. Probably not. His hand shakes when he knocks on the door.

The person who opens it is not who Jeonghan wanted to see; it’s Wonwoo, with his glasses on, makeup already off. He raises his eyebrows at Jeonghan.

“Hyung, what are you doing here?” He asks.

“Is uh– is Mingyu here?” Jeonghan replies, and he doesn’t know why he’s stumbling over his words like a toddler, but his palms have started to sweat again.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo says. “He lives here.”

“Wonwoo.”

“Oh,” Wonwoo says, “Oh, I see– I’ll uh… I’ll go say hi to Soonyoung, or something.”

“Alright,” Jeonghan says.

He doesn’t say that it’s okay, that Wonwoo doesn’t have to leave, he just wants to check on Mingyu, because he does want Wonwoo to leave. He’s not really sure why exactly, but he does want to be alone with Mingyu and this unnamed thing in between them. So Jeonghan lets Wonwoo leave, and he goes inside, and he shuts the door behind him.

“Who was it, hyung?” Mingyu calls from somewhere deeper in the apartment. “Is the food already here?”

Jeonghan doesn’t answer, he walks into the living room, and he sees Mingyu– and Mingyu sees him. They look at each other for a few moments in complete silence.

“Wonwoo left,” Jeonghan says eventually. “Sorry. I didn’t know you guys had ordered food.”

“He left? Why?”

Jeonghan doesn’t know how to answer that, so instead he says, “are you alright?”

Mingyu blinks back at him, something crossing over his face. “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”

“You’re lying,” Jeonghan says, flatly. “You’re a horrible liar, Mingyu.”

Mingyu’s expression turns into a scowl, “so what?”

“Mingyu,” Jeonghan says, and he’s still standing so far away from him, and Mingyu looks so mad, and it wasn’t supposed to go like this. “What did you mean when you asked if I loved you?”

“It was a joke,” Mingyu says. “I was just trying to make the video funny.”

“No, you weren’t,” Jeonghan says. “I was the one who did that. I lied, and I lied so well I fooled a polygraph. That was the funny part. The part where you asked if I loved you wasn’t funny at all.”

“You… what? What do you mean?”

“What do you mean ‘what do I mean’? Of course I love you, Mingyu. I love all the members, you know that.”

Mingyu crumples, “yeah. Yeah, of course.”

“Mingyu,” Jeonghan says again, like if he says his name enough times maybe it’ll be enough– maybe he won’t have to say the other thing.

Mingyu stands up and brushes his hair back, “did you want something else, hyung?”

“Mingyu,” Jeonghan insists, and he walks over to him, and he grabs his wrist, and he hasn’t thought this through– what does he do now? They’re standing very close together. “What kind of love did you mean?”

“I don’t– what do you mean what kind of love?”

“What kind of love do you want?” Jeonghan asks, insists, his grip tightening.

“I can’t answer that.”

“Why not?”

“I’m a bad liar, hyung,” Mingyu whispers. His voice has gotten very small, and he looks awfully fragile all of a sudden.

Jeonghan wants to say something, to say the right thing, something that would fix this, but he can’t– he can’t say it. Not like that. There’s a word he knows, but he can’t say it.

So instead, he leans up and he kisses Mingyu, just… briefly. For barely a second. He has to stand on his tiptoes to reach Mingyu’s lips.

Mingyu looks down at him wide eyed, and then– and then Mingyu kisses Jeonghan, kisses him hard, he wrenches his wrist out of Jeonghan’s grip and puts both hands on Jeonghan’s face, and he kisses him so hard that they almost topple over onto the floor. Instead they end up against the wall, Jeonghan caged in between Mingyu’s arms, and oh, oh, oh. Kissing Mingyu is so nice.

“Like that,” Mingyu whispers, pulling away just far enough that he can speak. “I want love like that.”

“I can work with that,” Jeonghan says. “I could do that.”

“You could?”

“Yes,” Jeonghan says.

Yes, yes, yes, Jeonghan thinks, it’s always yes when it’s you. He doesn’t say that part out loud. Instead he kisses Mingyu again.

Re: [FILL] let it be me

[kwontent]

something really bad is happening to him

sun and moon

[(Anonymous)]

Ship/Member: very partial to junhao, cheolshua, verkwan
Major Tags: any interpretation from long distance relationship to reincarnation/soulmate au
Additional Tags: N/A
Do Not Wants: major character death, sad ending

Prompt:

When my moon rises
Your sun rises as well under the same sky
In this different time
Our hearts are connected under the same sky

- nct 127, sun & moon (english translation by colorcodedlyrics)

Re: [FILL] burn it down

[soupblog]

oh, this was soso good, i loved it!!! i like the build up to the reveal of minghao being a firebender and all the little hints through out the story!!! i love atla sm this was perfect for me. thank u for the fill!!!

Re: [FILL] succession of shelters

[cloudshine]

ohhhh i love this

[FILL] here's your chance

[arundels]

Ship/Member: Joshua/Soonyoung
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: football au, the inherent homoeroticism of team sports, the things you do when on an adrenaline rush, joshy is hoshy's favourite hyung
Permission to remix: Yes

a/n: Shamelessly inspired by the Mbappe/Giroud moment in France's match against Poland during the world cup (here & here), and also Cho Guesung kissing Lee Kang-in on the pitch (here). Not to mention the fact that we know it's canon that Joshua can pick Hoshi up. Also worth referring to, my SVT lineup. Enjoy!

***

They’ve made a heroic comeback from three-nil down.

First, Jeonghan going down in the box — a little softly, but no one could say for sure that he’d dived — and winning them a penalty. Soonyoung had stepped up to the spot, the weight of the entire team’s dreams weighing heavy on his shoulders, and smashed the ball into the top corner with all the force of a hurricane.

Second, Mingyu with a header, soaring high above the scuffle, his aim sure and true. All of that from a perfect corner, delivered via Chan’s blessed, golden, left foot.

Third, a feat of dribbling from Seungkwan, all the way from their own defensive third. He’d sliced it to Soonyoung in the final second, and it had been a trivial thing for Soonyoung to tap it in across the line.

“That should be your goal,” Soonyoung had said, flinging himself into Seungkwan’s arms.

“Team goal!” Seungkwan had shouted in return, hands clapped against the side of Soonyoung’s head. “Team goal, team goal!”

And now — victory is so close Soonyoung can almost taste it. Ten minutes of extra time left to play, before they have to suffer the indignity of a penalty shootout. He’s hungry for the win, electric with his own desire.

He darts away from the defender, trying to find space to receive a pass from Chan. The defender shoves back into his space, and Chan’s attempt to pass falters. One of the full backs slides in and tackles the ball out from under Chan’s feet. Soonyoung is so frustrated he wants to scream.

“Foul!” Mingyu screams, sprinting back down the pitch as play moves in the other direction. He waves his arms overhead. The referee ignores him, as does Soonyoung. It was a clean tackle, which is what makes it especially annoying.

Soonyoung tracks back down the pitch, gaze darting to follow the ball, ready to spring into action once their defensive line gets possession back. In the midfield he enters Joshua’s orbit, and glances over at him. Joshua has a sweatband shoved into his hairline, but his fringe is long and hangs over it, stringy with sweat.

Joshua jerks his chin towards Soonyoung, a smirk quirking one side of his lips.

“Good job, Hoshi-yah,” he shouts, using the nickname that the fans have for Soonyoung. Even through the roar of the crowd around them, his voice slices through like a bell, or maybe it’s a warning siren. He winks, and Soonyoung’s stomach flips, shooting straight into his throat. “We need one more,” Joshua teases, grinning, “You going for the hat-trick?”

“Yeah!” Soonyoung yells back. He pumps one fist in the air. “Yeah, I’m gonna! Hyung, I’m gonna do it!”

Joshua laughs. He flicks his gaze back towards where the action is happening. Jihoon is muscling into the opposing striker’s space, and just manages to flick the ball out with a tricky backheel more typical of a forward than a centre-back. Vernon receives the pass with ease, like they’ve done this on the training ground before — they have — and whacks it down the pitch to Seungcheol.

“Here you go,” Joshua calls out, “here’s your chance.”

Then he turns his attention away from Soonyoung, laser-focusing in on what he needs to do. He and Jeonghan triangulate with Seungcheol in the midfield, alternately running ahead and falling back. The ball ricochets between them at speed, passing too quickly between deft feet to be intercepted. All three of them are good, Soonyoung thinks, skilful in different ways — Seungcheol is solid and decisive; Jeonghan is incisive and unrelenting.

And Joshua — Joshua is magnificent.

Soonyoung may be biased, but it’s not far from the truth. Joshua isn’t so much good with the ball as he is good with the game. He reads people, and lets them believe they’ve read him, only to slip in the opposite direction and away from them like water.

Soonyoung floats into the space right in front of Joshua. They’ve done this before. They’ve done this a thousand times before. He just needs to be in the right place, at the right time. He just needs to be somewhere where Joshua can see him. He just needs Joshua to see him.

“Shua-hyung—” he hears himself say, but it doesn’t carry over the noise of the crowd, and Joshua doesn’t hear him, of course.

But Joshua whips round, eyes searching for Soonyoung. Their gazes lock. Joshua smiles.

The ball comes hurtling out of the air at him. Soonyoung shuts his mind down, lets his body take over. He takes the first touch with the flat of his foot, bouncing the ball high so it almost leaps over the defender who’s trying to get in his way. Then he skirts around to meet the ball on the other side and sprints down the pitch. A second defender charges in his direction. Soonyoung dances away from him.

In his periphery he can see Mingyu on one side, Chan cutting in towards him on the other. But they have defenders hovering around them, too close, they’d get the ball if Soonyoung tries to pass, he can’t take the chance. He keeps running. The defensive line falls away behind him.

The goal looms ahead. The opposition keeper hunches down, sharp gaze trained in on Soonyoung.

Here you go, Soonyoung thinks, the voice in his head sounding eerily like Joshua, here’s your chance.

He takes a quick step to the right, just enough to fluster the keeper, and shoots.

The ball soars through the air, and Soonyoung watches it go, feeling himself lifted into the sky along with it, his breath trapped in his lungs, as he waits, and he waits, and he waits—

The stadium explodes into cheers. The ball rockets into the back of the net. Soonyoung hears himself scream, a roar that rips its way out of him. He looks up into the crowd, and feels their adoration pouring down upon him like a tidal wave.

“Kwon Hoshi!” the fans chant. “Kwon Hoshi! Kwon Hoshi!”

Soonyoung turns, and there Joshua is. Eyes bright, beaming at him. The thunderous crowd fades into the background, into a dull buzz of white noise. All Soonyoung knows is Joshua, standing six yards away from him, radiant with pride.

He sprints forward, and before he knows what he’s doing, he leaps into Joshua’s arms. Joshua catches him easily, hands underneath his thighs, and lifts him so Soonyoung is propped up on his waist. Joshua is so strong, Soonyoung thinks, feeling wild with something that he cannot name, something that fizzles all the way down to his fingers and toes. He clamps one hand behind Joshua’s neck, and looks down at him.

“Hyung, I did it,” he says. He presses his other hand to Joshua’s cheek. His skin is flushed with heat and slick with sweat. Soonyoung feels like he could cry. “Hyung, I did it! I did it!”

Joshua gazes up at him, tipping his head back slightly so he can look Soonyoung in the eye.

“Goob job, Hoshi-yah,” he says, just like before. But this time his voice is low, rumbling in his chest, and Soonyoung can almost feel it vibrating against him. It sends shockwaves rippling through his core.

The rest of the team floods into view around them, crowding for a group hug. Mingyu is shouting incomprehensibly at them, grinning so bright it could rival the sun. Chan has his hands on Joshua’s shoulders and is jumping up and down. Seungcheol has one arm slung around Joshua’s neck and the other holding onto Soonyoung’s waist. Jeonghan is smacking Soonyoung’s butt.

Joshua is still looking at him. Only looking at him.

Here you go, Soonyoung thinks, one more time. Here’s your chance.

This time it’s in his own voice, screaming at him in his head. He’s hungry for this, too.

He squeezes his eyes shut, and dips his head down. His lips touch Joshua’s and it feels like fire. The crowd roars around them. Mingyu lets out an ear-splitting shriek, and somewhere to his right Jeonghan is cackling with delight. Joshua smiles against his mouth.

They’ve won. He’s won. Soonyoung feels like a hero.

Re: [FILL] burn it down

[arundels]

ellie your mind your MIND. first of all the opening sentence is chilling and sets up the world so well. and then you continue to develop this war-stricken setting as a backdrop to Mingyu's relentless kindness. Mingyu lifts him up anyway, and carries him away. that's mingyu THAT'S MINGYU !!! it makes the reveal of his tragic backstory even more poignant because he's been through so much and still he loves STILL HE LOVES

the dialogue between gyuhao then builds the connection between them so deftly and efficiently. “I don’t have anyone,” / “You have me now.” OKAY!!! Then "I hate them all" / “Most of them are just following orders,” I'LL JUST DIE THEN!!!! minghao's “I’ll stay with you to the end.” HOLY SHIT

minghao saying “You’re not done yet,” then CATCHING THE FIRE like holy hell you're so cool minghao you're soooo cooooool,,, and the use of myungho / minghao you're so clever you're SO CLEVER

Minghao, a demon in the night, burns bright. - pulling it back to mingyu referring to the soldier who killed his mom as a demon oh NOOOOOOOOO ellie this is so excellent I'm shaking

[st8rgazer]

Ship/Member: Junhui / anyone
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: none
Do Not Wants: Cheating / Death

Prompt:

When facin' the things we turn away from
We're chasin' the way we were in Saigon
Oh, it's picked apart until there's nothing left of us to carry on
Now we're facin' the things we turn away from

- Saigon, Luke Hemmingsp

[FILL] i know a place (where the grass is really greener)

[almondtree]

Ship/Member: Joshua/Vernon
Major Tags: cisswap (girl josh), canon age difference, marijuana use
Additional Tags: good christian girl joshua hong, nervous stoner vernon chwe
Permission to remix: Yes

***

i went a little crazy and wrote 1.8k so it's posted on ao3!! and gifted to you!! here is the first straight fanfiction i've written since i first joined ao3 lmao it was actually sooo fun

Re: [FILL] polygraph

[lachrymosy]

Omg Ally!! How do you consistently turn out fics like this… so good!!! I love the dynamic between them here. I love the set up and how annoyed Wonwoo is with everything… also Jeonghan’s gaze on him is hot, and heavy. “I’m going to ask you the same questions now,” he says, voice oddly low. lol as you said, the weird sexual tension!!

And “Hyung,” he says, the honorific slipping from his lips before he’s conscious of it, “we should hang out more.” I love this line… Wonwoo be more smooth lol!

“Careful, Wonwoo-yah,” he says, voice lilting, “or I might think that you like me.” this is such a good Jeonghan line! And then Wonwoo getting annoyed again haha! I love this heist AU and how well you used their dynamics for that! So good!!!

[FILL] maybe it's too soon

[aenia]

Ship/Member: Soonyoung/Chan
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: meeting again, seventeen never got to debut, chan owns a dance studio, hoshi is a choreographer at pledis, feeling alienated in your hometown, the desire to connect to something and someone you thought you lost
Permission to remix: yes!
WC: 1.7k

***

The music fades out and for a moment the only sound in the studio is Chan’s rapid breaths. Then the song loops again. His aching muscles jump, reacting to the beat on instinct, but he can’t get his legs to move. He sinks to the floor, slowly. The crooked clock on the wall tells him he’s been at it for almost three hours. Ten, if he counts the seven hours of dance classes he’s taught earlier.

Sweat drips into his eyes, and Chan pushes his hair back. He should go shower, eat something, go to sleep.

Chan gets up and walks over to his phone on shaky legs. The phone almost slips and falls when he tries to turn off the music. Not that it really matters. The screen is already cracked.

In his exhausted daze it takes a moment for Chan to realise that someone’s knocking at the door. It’s almost midnight. Chan hopes it’s not a noise complaint. He’d tried to keep the music down, but the walls of the studios are thin and old.

He looks around to see if there’s a fresh shirt or sweater he could pull over, but another impatient knock makes him hurry to the door.

“Hello?”

A young man stands in front of the studio, a beanie and mask covering his face. So not the police or the neighbours, Chan thinks. His heartbeat slows down a bit. It’s not one of his students either, but the eyes look oddly familiar.

It clicks the exact moment the man pulls down his mask. “Chan-ah, it really is you!”

“Soonyoung-hyung?”

They haven’t seen each other in seven years, but Soonyoung doesn’t waste a second before he wraps Chan in his arms. He smells good and warm while Chan’s all sticky and gross.

“Hyung, I’m so–” He swallows.

They haven’t seen each other in seven years, but wrapping his arms around Soonyoung’s waist still feels right. He can’t believe Soonyoung’s standing here, on the threshold of his shitty suburban dance studio, pressing his body close to Chan’s sweaty one. Soonyoung pulls away and takes another good look at Chan. For a moment Chan feels shy in his dancing clothes, his worn-out sweatpants low on his hips and his shirt plastered against his skin, but Soonyoung looks at him with a slow smile. The embarrassment in Chan’s stomach makes place for another kind of heat. Soonyoung looks appraising and getting praise from Soonyoung had always made Chan want – to try harder, to push himself more, to become better. Made him simply want, too. It seems like the years haven’t changed that.

“What are you doing–?” The here gets caught in Chan’s throat. Here in his small, little life he’s tried to build for himself with the shreds of his dreams. Here in the outskirts of Iksan, hours away from Seoul. Here in Chan’s life, again, after so many years.

It’s odd, this clash of two worlds. Chan’s not sure he likes it. He’s made a place in the past for his time in Seoul, his training days, and his failure to debut. Soonyoung belongs to this past. Chan has put all his feelings and memories of him into a box titled what if and locked it tightly away. He doesn’t try to touch it often, this tender part of his heart. It still hurts, occasionally, a dull and muted pain, a deep nostalgia for a future that hadn’t happened. And now Soonyoung’s here, real and in the flesh. Chan feels something inside of him rattle loose.

He realises that they’re still standing at the door. “Do you want to…come in?” Chan trails off. He looks over his shoulder at the studio. It’s small and in dire need of a new paint job. An uncomfortable-looking plastic chair is the only place to sit down. The mirrors are fogged up, the air in the room is probably damp and smelly.

Soonyoung moves to step inside but Chan blocks him. “You know what, I was just about to head off. How about we talk over a drink? I’ll just shower real quick.”

“Sure.” Soonyoung frowns, but he’s too polite to say anything.

***

Chan steps out, half expecting Soonyoung to have left. But he’s still here, a few steps away, talking to someone on the phone. In the yellow street light he looks older, grown-up. His shoes are nice and clean, his jacket looks expensive. He’s every bit the Seoul-boy they’d tried so hard to imitate when they were teenagers. Soonyoung says goodbye to the person on the phone, turns to Chan and smiles. For a blink, he’s a complete stranger.

(It would be easier if he were just a stranger. If they met at a bar, catching each other’s eye across the room. Then Chan could smile coyly and lean forward, drawing attention to his arms, to his chest. They’d talk and flirt and at the end of the night Chan would follow him home or to a hotel. If Soonyoung were a stranger, Chan could let himself be touched and lose himself in the feeling of skin against skin. If Soonyoung were a stranger, Chan could kiss him without regrets.)

Chan puts his key into the door, pushing his shoulder against it when it refuses to close completely.

“Is the studio yours?”

“Yeah.” Chan puts his hands in his pockets and pulls up his shoulders.

“That’s so cool! I always dreamt about opening a studio of my own.”

Chan wants to scoff. Soonyoung has choreographed for multiple A-list K-pop groups. He’s friends with all the top dancers in the industry, regularly posting practice videos with them together. Hell, Soonyoung himself is a legend in the industry. For Chan, teaching pubescent teens how to do a simple Kick Ball Change was one of his only options. When he returned from Seoul he barely finished school; he never went to college. But he knows Soonyoung is genuine with his excitement, which almost feels worse.

He puts an arm around Chan’s shoulders and pulls him close. Soonyoung’s hand finds Chan’s ear almost naturally and playfully tugs at his lobe.

“Look at you, so young and already a business owner! The girls must be all over you, hm?”

It’s an old joke between them. Chan hadn’t expected Soonyoung to bring it up again, but he gives in and plays along. He presses closer, their bodies now flushed together. It almost makes Soonyoung stumble, his breath skittering hotly across Chan’s cheek.

“Hyung,” Chan says, voice pitched low.

Soonyoung stills and looks at him, really looks at him. His eyes are dark. He seems to understand it now. They’re no longer the people they were when they were young.

It surprises Chan when Soonyoung pulls away. He’s given an opening he thought Soonyoung would take, but Soonyoung hasn’t. Cold disappointment fills his body.

“I’m hungry. And thirsty. Let’s go where we can get both a drink and a snack, hm? Hyung’s paying for the first round,” Soonyoung says.

***

Chan ends up searching for nearby bars on his phone. He picks the first one that looks halfway decent and somewhat expensive. His phone tells him it’s seven minutes away. They walk in silence. It was bound to get awkward eventually, and Chan simply hopes that Soonyoung doesn’t regret agreeing to drinks with him.

He tries to see the streets through Soonyoung’s eyes. It’s quiet and empty this late, nothing of the restless energy of Seoul. Most of the neon signs on the buildings are switched off for the night. It’s boring, it has nothing to offer.

Chan wonders what Soonyoung sees in him – twenty-three and back in his home town, living with his parents again. Chan wonders if Soonyoung is glad he pushed through and stayed at the company by any means possible. Unlike Chan, who packed his bag and went home when it became clear that they would never debut. It had been so final, so detrimental. Everything he’s worked for in the last two years slipped through his fingers and crumbled in the dust. Chan suddenly found himself empty-handed. He didn’t have a choice but to return home, and even though he swore he’d work his way up again, swore to return to Seoul again, he’s still here. He’s still fucking here.

***

“Ah!” Soonyoung points excitedly into an alley. “Forget about the bar, let’s drink there!”

Tugged between the buildings is a lone cluster of pojangmacha. Soft, warm light glows from the tents. Chan has to admit it looks cosy and lets himself be pulled along by Soonyoung. A tiny part of him whispers that Soonyoung chose it so he could make an early exit after one drink, but Chan ignores that voice. He’s too tired to have any hopes for how the night will end; he’ll just go along and see how it plays out.

Like promised, Soonyoung gets them the first round. He returns with a bottle of soju and two gimbap. Chan pours them a round. They drink. Chan pours them another round.

“Hyung, what brought you here?” Chan finally asks.

“Ah, I met one of your students. She’s a trainee at the company and she mentioned her dance teacher, a handsome young man called Lee Chan. Told me how she learned everything from him.”

Soonyoung smiles at him over the rim of his glass. Even in the dim light, Chan can see that his cheeks are already flushed red.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about it. About you. It’s been so long. In the end, curiosity got the best of me,” Soonyoung continues. “I’m glad I came.”

Warmth pools in Chan’s stomach. Want and hunger and desperateness. He leans closer and smiles at Soonyoung, too. A little bit coy and cute. Soonyoung always liked it when he acted that way. If Chan plays his cards right, if he isn’t completely misreading Soonyoung, the night could go somewhere. And Chan wants a bit of Soonyoung, a bit of everything Soonyoung stands for so badly. He’s not proud of it. He’s not proud of a lot of things in his life, but if he could Soonyoung to want him, to desire him, it’d be validating. Proof that there’s still something worth wanting about him.

He reaches out for the soju bottle only to brush his fingertips against the back of Soonyoung's hand.

“I’m glad, too.”

***

a/n: sorry, this sort of got out of my hand… hope it still has some of the spirit of the original prompt and that you enjoyed reading!

Re: [FILL] let it be me

[aenia]

[screams into hands] this is so fucking good oh my god. thank you so so much for writing this. i'm so obsessed with your soonwoon, you just get them!! i especially loved the lines "It feels different now. Wonwoo doesn’t know where to be in his own body, what parts of himself to fill out." and the whole paragraph following it! also pouring one out for wonwoo please just make a move bro i'm begging u

[FILL] sharp spines

[lightupfic]

Ship/Member: Seungcheol/Soonyoung
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: character study, trans characters
Permission to remix: Yes

***

It hurts to look at them.

Seungcheol is so pretty under the night sky, staring up at the stars in wonder, the cold glow of the moonlight casting faint shadows across their delicate features. They’re so calm, so at peace with the world around them and so at peace with their place in the world. Their long hair, flowing freely in the ocean breeze, frames their face so perfectly, ticking Soonyoung’s cheek each time he leans closer.

Soonyoung is enraptured by beauty.

But it hurts to look at them.

“Are you okay?” They ask.

Is he okay? He thinks he is, until he looks at Seungcheol and sees everything he is not. Everything he wishes he could be.

Where Soonyoung is loud and abrasive, Seungcheol is calmly excitable. Soonyoung is a strict leader, he demands perfection not because he is being unreasonable, but because he wants what is best for his team, while Seungcheol is kind and patient in a way Soonyoung can only strive to be. Seungcheol always tells him he’s being too harsh on himself, but when Soonyoung treats himself with callous cruelty, Seungcheol becomes warmer and more loving than ever.

“I don’t know.”

He is sure his words are quiet enough not to be heard over the rhythmical sounds of the ocean’s tide, but Seungcheol moves their hand over his, holding his hand in their own as if to remind him they’re here. Soonyoung likes that about them, they never force him to speak. They trust he will come to them in his own him. He’s not sure he deserves that trust.

Soonyoung knows he’s not okay, he just doesn’t want to think about why.

He knows why too.

It’s not because he and Seungcheol are so different that Soonyoung aches. It’s because they are the same and he wants what Seungcheol has.

He exists in this world as others want him to exist, he is his parent’s son and his sister’s younger brother, a reliable hyung to Seokmin and Chan and all of the people who depend on him to be that for them. But he wants to be what Seungcheol is.

Neither a son nor a daughter, sometimes both, or only one. Someone who knows who they are and is brave enough to make that known. Someone worthy of the love that makes Soonyoung feel like a fraud to receive.

How can Seungcheol love someone they don’t even know? Maybe they love the person they think Soonyoung is, but they might never love Soonyoung.

“I love you, unnie” he tells them.

Seungcheol smiles, they look at him so fondly, with so much devotion and pure, unadulterated affection. Soonyoung has to look away.

“Unnie loves you too.”

He wonders if they know, he doesn’t think they do. He rips his hand away from theirs and stands up, brushing the sand off himself before holding a hand out to help them up too.

It’s not healthy to keep doing this, to take everything from Seungcheol that they offer him, to remain so close to them when it only seems to lead to more hurt.

But Soonyoung lives so much of his life for others and he has already lost so much, he wants to be selfish for once. He refuses to let go of the warmth and safety that comes with Seungcheol’s presence in his life.

Re: [FILL] succession of shelters

[(Anonymous)]

ah, not being able to go back to what was once home. i feel seen.

Re: [FILL] lost in the forest

[biggrstaffbunch]

Thank you so much - your prompt was so lush, and I was eager to explore sense of self and its correlation to love, and how love changes us ❤️

[FILL]: True (False)

[thesolemneyed]

Ship/Member: Mingyu/Seokmin
Major Tags:
Additional Tags: Confessions Gone Wrong, Idolverse, Angst
Permission to remix: Yes

i think i might be clinically addicted to writing angsty shorts atp but hey !! thats okay right ??
ao3 twt

Re: [FILL] less lonely together

[klav]

OH MY GODDDDD. Your brain is huge. Jeonghan is fucking Seungkwan when Mingyu calls. What a banger opening line, and then to continue weaving this messy, emotional web — it’s so skillful. I’m obsessed with Yoon Jeonghan who has slept with multiple people in the industry (SANA………. WONWOO?!?) And oh the bitterness between them… how Seungkwan Gets Jeonghan and empathizes with him but that doesn’t make it hurt any less… this was incredible thank you so much!!

Re: [FILL] as that hollow moon

[klav]

Ooooooh this so delicious x___x I love how you held off the reveal that Mingyu had asked Wonwoo out, that the three of them have been entangled from the beginning. Jeonghan demanding that it mean something… then returning for Mingyu… and the implication that Wonwoo is now sleeping with Mingyu!! He left him on the bed, hot to the touch?! I feel like that meme of the guy connecting the red strings hahahaha this was masterful, thank you so much!

[FILL] how to feel finger to finger

[citadis]

Ship/Member: Soonyoung & Minghao
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: android idols(+and their human caretakers)
Permission to remix: Yes

a/n: I don't usually write stuff like this but it was fun to try! sorry I didn't hit a lot of the tags you were looking for, hope you enjoy still :)

***

Minghao had become an expert in Soonyoung’s inner and outer workings very quickly. Those who had never worked closely with or properly known a synthe were puzzled when Minghao talked about it. They were made, not born, and thus to some should have been infallible creations. And they were, but just like humans, they fell sick sometimes, and broke bones – or rather, an analogue part. That’s what Minghao told them, to hopefully get it across. He could make the comparison to a car too – made, not born, yet repairs were always expected. Minghao wouldn’t make that comparison, though Soonyoung had never shied away from it when he explained it himself.

It felt cruel that synthetics, bestowed with consciousness, were subject to the same general design policies as vehicles. Minghao didn’t rant about that much anymore, everyone had already heard it all. And it didn’t change anything.

Minghao hadn’t been expecting to debut among a few synthes, because it hadn’t always been that way. Soonyoung and Mingyu had been something like last minute additions. A few withdrawals from their pre-debut team, and despite plenty of trainees clamoring for a spot – the agency opted to take up a synthetic human produced on a deal for some new, specialized models. Beautiful, meticulous things. Mingyu came first. Minghao remembers hearing someone, Seungkwan maybe, complaining about the audacity of creating something (someone) so beautiful after the first time they met. And it was true. For most of them, it was their first encounter with a synthe. And if there was to be an example of these synthetic humans being immaculate, perfect creations, Mingyu was one of them. He was mild-mannered and a bit shy when he introduced himself; the introduction was much the same as any other time new trainees were brought in for the first time. No one acknowledged the animatronic elephant in the room.

What shocked Minghao most that first time he came face to face with a synthe were Mingyu’s eyes. Sure, there was something digital there, but it was so completely different from the blank glassy eyes of those early androids. At the time, Minghao had stopped himself from reacting too much, unsure if perhaps androids were somehow endowed with extrasensory capabilities, or at least able to read the twitch of his lips and eyes like a book. That turned out not to be the case, at least with Mingyu. He was made, in the strictest sense, to be a celebrity; he was as similar to a non-synthetic human as fake flesh and fake blood could be.

Soonyoung – Hoshi, was different. He came along later, and he did not shy away from his provenance in his first introduction. A stage name, ready in hand, derived from a string of numbers in his registration number. He had a drive towards becoming an idol that even outdid some of the others. He practiced, hard, and drove the others to as well. Even though he always joked about it, his synthetic nature was not outright obvious from his demeanor.

He seemed to have more issues than Mingyu, and Minghao was willing to help him out. Those first few times he was mostly curious how they, his now-friends, worked. Like a frog dissection done in school to learn about the organs attributed to most non-synthetic animals, Minghao felt it necessary to be somewhat informed on those synthetic counterparts. So, with Soonyoung’s guidance on the crimping of fine wires within his electrical system, and cleaning of membranes, and plenty of other such tasks, Minghao ended up becoming proficient in ensuring his friend’s well-being. Or, repairing him, as others would call it.

(The first time Soonyoung guided Minghao’s hand into and onto a panel behind the skin of his back, Minghao could hear the smug smile when the other said, “at least take me out on a date first!”)

With Soonyoung’s penchant for injury and other malfunctions, as well as his disposition, Minghao quietly suspected there was something fundamentally different between him and Mingyu. That maybe, Soonyoung was not the deluxe, tailor-made idol synthe that Mingyu was. That maybe he was made – destined for something else (or maybe, destined for nothing at all, Minghao hated to think). After all, the group had been under the impression there was only going to be one synthe among them when they were told Mingyu was joining. Minghao never said anything, but he was sure Soonyoung knew as well.

There was one time, when Soonyoung was sleeping. Synthes did sleep, and it did serve the same purpose as it did for non-synthetics; parsing, storing, organizing the memory. Minghao was curious about what Soonyoung dreamt about, but always forgot to ask.

Minghao touched a few fingers to Soonyoung’s face while he slept, for whatever reason. Given that he had had a hand inside the other, it was not the most intimate act between them. His skin was virtually real; it was warm to the touch, it got cut and it healed. For some brief moments, Minghao did forget about the fundamental difference between himself and Soonyoung and Mingyu.

When his fingers grazed across Soonyoung’s lips, his mouth parted wide, something more than just a gasp one might expect. Minghao retracted his fingers, quickly, but before then his friend’s eyes were open and staring at him, with a look he didn’t recognize.

Re: [FILL] i wanna see you (but you're not mine)

[arundels]

I feel insane this is beautiful and so full of emotion, and the way you used the mug to depict the timey-wimeyness of time and memory... so good. I'm on my phone so can't copy lines properly but the bit where soonyoung tries to throw the mug away and wonwoo stops him, I gasped. Gorgeous writing!! And the imagery of clean lines versus the misshapen mug to depict the wonhan contrast. It's all so good thank you for sharing this with us!!

Re: [FILL] how to feel finger to finger

[almondtree]

oh wow this is lovely!! no worries about not following the tags because you still got down exactly the vibes i was going for, and also turned it into almost a hoshi character study which i can never say no to. the comparison between mingyu and hoshi is delightful as well, the idea that mingyu is programmed to be a perfect celebrity but soonyoung seems like he might have evolved into something else...love it! thank you for writing this!!

out of the gray city

[almondtree]

Ship/Member: i'm going to do something i never do and request meanie
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: bittersweetisms...
Do Not Wants: None

Prompt:

Why always me?
What'd I do wrong?
What am I in the rain for, in the rain for?
Rain in my tears, pouring in my eyes
Is it something that you sent to me?

- Take Me Home, ATEEZ

Re: [FILL] what kind of love

[(Anonymous)]

as a gyuhan lovers I really really love this♡♡♡ thanks for writing this!