Ship/Member: seokmin/minghao Major Tags: N/A Additional Tags: falling out of love, lovers to friends Permission to remix: Yes!!
thank you for the prompt, sorry if this wasn’t exactly what you had in mind <3 ***
it wouldn’t be this bad if seokmin didn’t remember exactly what it felt like. the sickening wrench in his gut when he and minghao had first gotten wine-drunk together, the way he couldn’t pull his eyes off the other’s berry-stained lips. the way the jagged hunger had all but consumed him. the way every nerve in the surface of his skin would dance to meet his slender fingers’ touch. the way he’d confessed feverishly, pulled the other’s mouth to his in a blaze of heat.
it wouldn’t be this bad if seokmin didn’t remember just what it meant to be in love with him. a head over heels kind of love. an unquenchable grease fire kind of love. a even-skin-to-skin-we’re-not-close-enough kind of love.
but he remembered. oh, for better or for worse, he could remember exactly how he thought his feelings for minghao would tear him apart. burn him from the inside out until there was nothing left but ash to dust minghao’s skin.
“what’s got you stuck in your head?” minghao trailed one hand delicately down his arm, gaze fixed on seokmin searchingly.
seokmin lay back on the bed they’d been sharing for months, his own eyes locked on that one spot of peeling plaster on the ceiling. he knew the other wasn’t obtuse. wasn’t ignorant to the subtle shift of the tectonic plates they stood on.
“i don’t know,” his voice is lower than usual, scratchy from disuse. “things are… different.”
“different how?” minghao has his own guesses, has felt the distance stretch imperceptibly between them, but still he wants to hear it from his lips.
“i don’t think i’m in love with you anymore.”
the words curl out like tendrils of smoke from a lit cigarette, floating their way to lodge deep in minghao’s chest. he withdraws his hand from where he’d been tracing mindless circles in seokmin’s palm.
“okay,” minghao says, “thank you for your honesty.”
“it’s not that i don’t love you — i do,” the words stutter out, staccato beat matching the frenetic pace of seokmin’s heart. “i don’t think i’ll ever stop loving you, i just… i’m not in love with you. not like i was. and it would be unfair to continue pretending otherwise, right?”
“yes, it would be a disservice to us both. minghao’s eyes are sympathetic. warm, still, and his voice is so tender seokmin almost feels like throwing up. “so, where do you want to go from here?”
“i don’t want—“ to impose. to hurt you any more. to stand in the way of your happiness. “i want you to be in my life. is that selfish?”
“mm, there’s nothing wrong with admitting a selfish desire, min.”
they lie in bed like that for a while, two slender bodies barely a hair’s breadth apart. chests rising and falling in unison.
“do you think… we can be friends?” seokmin says, tentative and gentle. as if he is afraid this fragile, unknown thing between them will break before it can bloom.
[FILL]: unburning
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: falling out of love, lovers to friends
Permission to remix: Yes!!
thank you for the prompt, sorry if this wasn’t exactly what you had in mind <3
***
it wouldn’t be this bad if seokmin didn’t remember exactly what it felt like. the sickening wrench in his gut when he and minghao had first gotten wine-drunk together, the way he couldn’t pull his eyes off the other’s berry-stained lips. the way the jagged hunger had all but consumed him. the way every nerve in the surface of his skin would dance to meet his slender fingers’ touch. the way he’d confessed feverishly, pulled the other’s mouth to his in a blaze of heat.
it wouldn’t be this bad if seokmin didn’t remember just what it meant to be in love with him. a head over heels kind of love. an unquenchable grease fire kind of love. a even-skin-to-skin-we’re-not-close-enough kind of love.
but he remembered. oh, for better or for worse, he could remember exactly how he thought his feelings for minghao would tear him apart. burn him from the inside out until there was nothing left but ash to dust minghao’s skin.
“what’s got you stuck in your head?” minghao trailed one hand delicately down his arm, gaze fixed on seokmin searchingly.
seokmin lay back on the bed they’d been sharing for months, his own eyes locked on that one spot of peeling plaster on the ceiling. he knew the other wasn’t obtuse. wasn’t ignorant to the subtle shift of the tectonic plates they stood on.
“i don’t know,” his voice is lower than usual, scratchy from disuse. “things are… different.”
“different how?” minghao has his own guesses, has felt the distance stretch imperceptibly between them, but still he wants to hear it from his lips.
“i don’t think i’m in love with you anymore.”
the words curl out like tendrils of smoke from a lit cigarette, floating their way to lodge deep in minghao’s chest. he withdraws his hand from where he’d been tracing mindless circles in seokmin’s palm.
“okay,” minghao says, “thank you for your honesty.”
“it’s not that i don’t love you — i do,” the words stutter out, staccato beat matching the frenetic pace of seokmin’s heart. “i don’t think i’ll ever stop loving you, i just… i’m not in love with you. not like i was. and it would be unfair to continue pretending otherwise, right?”
“yes, it would be a disservice to us both. minghao’s eyes are sympathetic. warm, still, and his voice is so tender seokmin almost feels like throwing up. “so, where do you want to go from here?”
“i don’t want—“ to impose. to hurt you any more. to stand in the way of your happiness. “i want you to be in my life. is that selfish?”
“mm, there’s nothing wrong with admitting a selfish desire, min.”
they lie in bed like that for a while, two slender bodies barely a hair’s breadth apart. chests rising and falling in unison.
“do you think… we can be friends?” seokmin says, tentative and gentle. as if he is afraid this fragile, unknown thing between them will break before it can bloom.