Ship/Member: joshua/junhui Major Tags: friends with benefits, the “oh” moment Additional Tags: n/a Permission to remix: yes
It’s not really a surprise that Junhui knows the code to Joshua’s apartment door. They’ve known each other for a while, after all. It’s been — Joshua grimaces as he counts in his head. They were already doing this last Christmas, weren’t they? Joshua distinctly remembers Junhui making a joke about being an easy date, so they must have been.
It’s been over a year, then. A little weird, honestly, but not the point.
The point is that when Joshua hears the lock beep from where he’s sitting in the bathroom he doesn’t bother getting up, because he knows it’s Junhui, because no one else would let themselves in so comfortably. A year ago he might have panicked, might have rushed out of the bathtub to get himself presentable before Junhui could find him. Maybe even six months ago, he would have done that.
Now Joshua doesn’t move.
Junhui can find him here if he wants him, he thinks, taking another sip of wine and tilting his head back to look up at the ceiling, eyes drifting closed of their own accord. He’s seen Joshua doing worse, which is also a little weird if Joshua thinks about it too long, so he doesn’t.
And sure enough —
“Oh!” Junhui says, his head poking around the bathroom door. Joshua blinks his eyes back open and turns to look at him, head lolling on the rim of the tub as he finds himself smiling, just a little.
“Hey.”
Junhui smiles brightly in return, pushing the door all the way open to come into the bathroom for real. Joshua watches with mild surprise as he comes closer until he’s squatting down right next to the rim of the tub, dropping down onto the bathmat and resting against the side, as though the porcelain is a perfectly comfortable place for his head to be.
“Hey,” he says, big eyes blinking sleepily, his gaze focused right on Joshua’s face. He tilts his chin towards the glass in Joshua’s hand. “Rough day?”
Joshua breathes out a humourless laugh, tilting his head back again.
“You could say that,” he says dryly, not offering any more detail. He doesn’t really want to talk about it with Junhui, honestly, but that’s not Junhui’s fault. He doesn’t really want to have to think about it at all. Junhui’s quiet next to him, like maybe he can tell. He doesn’t ask. He doesn’t say anything at all, seemingly perfectly content just to sit.
“You didn’t bring in your phone,” Joshua says, finally noticing what’s strange about Junhui just sitting there, all his attention on Joshua.
“I wanted to talk to you,” Junhui says with a shrug and a smile. Joshua laughs a little, he can’t help it.
“Cute,” he says, one damp hand reaching to pinch at Junhui’s cheek. Junhui flushes and swats at him, making irritated sounds like a cat, but he doesn’t actually move out of the way. When Joshua’s hand comes to run through his hair he lets him do it. Leans into it, even.
When Joshua first started sleeping with Junhui he thought it was great, because he wouldn’t have to put in so much effort. He still did, of course, at least at first. It wasn’t something he could just switch off. But it was a relief that Junhui didn’t want anything from him, not like any of the boyfriends Joshua’d had before. Junhui didn’t need Joshua to come to his work parties or listen to him complain about his mom. He didn’t need Joshua to choose the perfect date spot every time. Junhui was right, that first Christmas. He was an easy date. He wasn’t a date at all.
Joshua isn’t sure, now, what Junhui is.
Before, Joshua would have invited Junhui into the tub. Not because he wanted to — he doesn’t — but out of some weird need to turn the moment into something sexy. Even in a moment to himself, Joshua always needed to be desirable.
Joshua doesn’t actually want Junhui in the tub, though, and Junhui doesn’t seem like he cares that Joshua didn’t ask. He’s still just sitting there, heavy eyelids struggling back up every time he blinks, telling Joshua a meandering story about someone who talked to him on the subway today. He seems perfectly comfortable in his spot on the floor, still. He’s showed no sign that he wants to get in with him, or even that he wants Joshua to get out so they can move on to something else.
“What do you want for dinner?” Joshua asks when Junhui hits a lull in his story — either because he’s reached the end of it or because he’s trying to remember what happened next, Joshua honestly can’t tell. Either way, he doesn’t seem upset to be interrupted. “I can order something, if you want.”
Junhui shrugs, easy, like it really doesn’t matter to him at all.
“Are you done in here?”
Joshua pauses. He isn’t, honestly. He hasn’t finished his wine. He doesn’t particularly want to get up. Before he can open his mouth to lie about it Junhui’s mouth quirks into a little smile, like Joshua’s silence is an answer in itself. He stretches to dip his fingertips into the bath water and frowns.
“The water’s getting cold,” he says, reaching towards the tap above Joshua’s feet and switching it on hot. “There,” he says, raising his voice to be heard above the sound of rushing water, and Joshua stares at him.
He’d always thought it made it less romantic, that Junhui has seen so many unpleasant things about him. That Joshua never really pretended with him, or tried to be someone he wasn’t. That he honestly barely tried at all. He hadn’t thought —
He hadn’t thought.
When the water’s warm enough Junhui switches it back off, then pushes himself to stand up.
“You don’t have to order dinner,” he says as he stretches, shaking his arms a little before they flop back down to his sides. “I can just make something. You stay in here til you're done.”
[FILL] zero signs of kismet
Major Tags: friends with benefits, the “oh” moment
Additional Tags: n/a
Permission to remix: yes
It’s not really a surprise that Junhui knows the code to Joshua’s apartment door. They’ve known each other for a while, after all. It’s been — Joshua grimaces as he counts in his head. They were already doing this last Christmas, weren’t they? Joshua distinctly remembers Junhui making a joke about being an easy date, so they must have been.
It’s been over a year, then. A little weird, honestly, but not the point.
The point is that when Joshua hears the lock beep from where he’s sitting in the bathroom he doesn’t bother getting up, because he knows it’s Junhui, because no one else would let themselves in so comfortably. A year ago he might have panicked, might have rushed out of the bathtub to get himself presentable before Junhui could find him. Maybe even six months ago, he would have done that.
Now Joshua doesn’t move.
Junhui can find him here if he wants him, he thinks, taking another sip of wine and tilting his head back to look up at the ceiling, eyes drifting closed of their own accord. He’s seen Joshua doing worse, which is also a little weird if Joshua thinks about it too long, so he doesn’t.
And sure enough —
“Oh!” Junhui says, his head poking around the bathroom door. Joshua blinks his eyes back open and turns to look at him, head lolling on the rim of the tub as he finds himself smiling, just a little.
“Hey.”
Junhui smiles brightly in return, pushing the door all the way open to come into the bathroom for real. Joshua watches with mild surprise as he comes closer until he’s squatting down right next to the rim of the tub, dropping down onto the bathmat and resting against the side, as though the porcelain is a perfectly comfortable place for his head to be.
“Hey,” he says, big eyes blinking sleepily, his gaze focused right on Joshua’s face. He tilts his chin towards the glass in Joshua’s hand. “Rough day?”
Joshua breathes out a humourless laugh, tilting his head back again.
“You could say that,” he says dryly, not offering any more detail. He doesn’t really want to talk about it with Junhui, honestly, but that’s not Junhui’s fault. He doesn’t really want to have to think about it at all. Junhui’s quiet next to him, like maybe he can tell. He doesn’t ask. He doesn’t say anything at all, seemingly perfectly content just to sit.
“You didn’t bring in your phone,” Joshua says, finally noticing what’s strange about Junhui just sitting there, all his attention on Joshua.
“I wanted to talk to you,” Junhui says with a shrug and a smile. Joshua laughs a little, he can’t help it.
“Cute,” he says, one damp hand reaching to pinch at Junhui’s cheek. Junhui flushes and swats at him, making irritated sounds like a cat, but he doesn’t actually move out of the way. When Joshua’s hand comes to run through his hair he lets him do it. Leans into it, even.
When Joshua first started sleeping with Junhui he thought it was great, because he wouldn’t have to put in so much effort. He still did, of course, at least at first. It wasn’t something he could just switch off. But it was a relief that Junhui didn’t want anything from him, not like any of the boyfriends Joshua’d had before. Junhui didn’t need Joshua to come to his work parties or listen to him complain about his mom. He didn’t need Joshua to choose the perfect date spot every time. Junhui was right, that first Christmas. He was an easy date. He wasn’t a date at all.
Joshua isn’t sure, now, what Junhui is.
Before, Joshua would have invited Junhui into the tub. Not because he wanted to — he doesn’t — but out of some weird need to turn the moment into something sexy. Even in a moment to himself, Joshua always needed to be desirable.
Joshua doesn’t actually want Junhui in the tub, though, and Junhui doesn’t seem like he cares that Joshua didn’t ask. He’s still just sitting there, heavy eyelids struggling back up every time he blinks, telling Joshua a meandering story about someone who talked to him on the subway today. He seems perfectly comfortable in his spot on the floor, still. He’s showed no sign that he wants to get in with him, or even that he wants Joshua to get out so they can move on to something else.
“What do you want for dinner?” Joshua asks when Junhui hits a lull in his story — either because he’s reached the end of it or because he’s trying to remember what happened next, Joshua honestly can’t tell. Either way, he doesn’t seem upset to be interrupted. “I can order something, if you want.”
Junhui shrugs, easy, like it really doesn’t matter to him at all.
“Are you done in here?”
Joshua pauses. He isn’t, honestly. He hasn’t finished his wine. He doesn’t particularly want to get up. Before he can open his mouth to lie about it Junhui’s mouth quirks into a little smile, like Joshua’s silence is an answer in itself. He stretches to dip his fingertips into the bath water and frowns.
“The water’s getting cold,” he says, reaching towards the tap above Joshua’s feet and switching it on hot. “There,” he says, raising his voice to be heard above the sound of rushing water, and Joshua stares at him.
He’d always thought it made it less romantic, that Junhui has seen so many unpleasant things about him. That Joshua never really pretended with him, or tried to be someone he wasn’t. That he honestly barely tried at all. He hadn’t thought —
He hadn’t thought.
When the water’s warm enough Junhui switches it back off, then pushes himself to stand up.
“You don’t have to order dinner,” he says as he stretches, shaking his arms a little before they flop back down to his sides. “I can just make something. You stay in here til you're done.”
Oh, Joshua realizes.
He hadn’t thought.