Ship/Member: jeonghan/wonwoo Major Tags: N/A Additional Tags: unrequited love, being on the other side of it, childhood friends, mentions of past relationships, ambiguous ending. Permission to remix: Yes
***
“don’t take me home,” jeonghan says from the backseat. he doesn’t know why he had called wonwoo in the first place. he should have taken the bus home, ordered some chinese food and slept the day off. like it was any other day.
wonwoo meets his eyes through the rear view mirror for a brief moment, asking why without asking. why did you leave work early? are you okay? what did you need me for?
jeonghan wants to close his eyes and sleep this away. he wants to go back to his office and take the invitation he left there on purpose. “seungcheol is getting married next month.”
there he said it. a name he hasn’t spoken for the past two years. the world doesn’t fall silent like he had imagined. but that doesn’t mean he isn’t affected. it’s like a ghost that had been sleeping for a long time had woken up and he remembers all the haunting.
wonwoo looks at him once again, quick and studying. “oh,” is all he says.
jeonghan closes his eyes and buries himself into the seat. “anywhere. it doesn’t matter. i don’t want to be home now.”
in his dream, he sees mingyu, a shattered plate on the floor, his fingers bleeding. then there is seungcheol, raised voices and slamming doors. he hears wonwoo calling his name.
when he wakes up, he finds himself three hours away from home. in gongjin. where the ocean waves sound like i like you, i like you, i like you.
the first thing jeonghan realizes is that he’s hungry. he doesn’t remember eating anything apart from the sandwich he shared with seokmin that morning. wonwoo drives them to the seafood restaurant that jeonghan likes.
jeonghan orders maeuntang for him and ramyeon for wonwoo because boy can’t even stand the fishy smell let alone eat something fish. “we could have eaten somewhere else.”
wonwoo pours water in a glass and pushes it towards jeonghan. “you loved their maeuntang last time we came here.”
the second thing jeonghan realizes is that seungcheol is somewhere at the back of his head. he isn’t going to vanish anytime soon. but with wonwoo in front of him, it doesn’t feel like his world is about to end tomorrow.
jeonghan looks out at the sea through the glass windows. it’s beautiful as he remembers it, the sun bleeding gold over the waters. it’s calming and daunting at the same time. the last time they were both here, wonwoo almost drowned in the very same place.
“i am sorry about the last time,” jeonghan says.
wonwoo turns to look out at the sea. to see what jeonghan is on about. he stays quiet for a couple of minutes. “aren’t you like, eight years late?” there is a small smile when wonwoo looks back at him and jeonghan takes it, lets himself relax in that familiarity.
at eighteen, jeonghan learns nothing good ever comes from playing pranks.
wonwoo isn’t the one to get fooled by his antics. he has known jeonghan long enough to see through jeonghan’s lies. one time when jeonghan falls into the water purposely to deceive wonwoo into thinking he’s drowning, jeonghan expects him to call him out from above. in case he really falls for it, to cry for help because he can’t swim.
wonwoo calls his name once, in panic. then the next thing jeonghan hears is the loud splash of water and the rest of the events are blurry in his memory. he doesn’t remember how he brings a passed-out wonwoo to the shore nor does he remember how much time it takes for wonwoo to gain consciousness. even when wonwoo wakes up, he doesn’t meet jeonghan’s eyes.
at some point, jeonghan holds back his tears because wonwoo is supposed to be the smart one between them, he shouldn’t have jumped into the water because something worse could have happened, he should have known that it was a prank—
“since when were you this gullible?” jeonghan turns to him, glaring, “even if i was really drowning, you can't jump into the water like that. this isn't a movie, wonwoo.”
jeonghan is being too much, he knows. if anyone should be mad and yelling, it should be wonwoo. jeonghan is the one responsible for wonwoo almost dying. but jeonghan is the one angry and asking questions because what fool believes him?
wonwoo, who is now curled up, knees drawn closer to his chest, looks down at the sand. his face doesn’t look like he’s mad anymore. that’s wonwoo, he doesn’t stay mad for more than fifteen minutes.
“i was scared. i didn’t think at all,” wonwoo’s voice shakes a little. he must be still in shock and jeonghan feels so bad. they don’t say anything for a while because jeonghan lets what happened to sink in and wonwoo looks like he has more to say. then wonwoo looks up at jeonghan, meeting his eyes and says something with a sad smile, in a very quiet voice. jeonghan almost doesn’t hear it over the sound of waves crashing behind him.
(he hears it clearly even in its quiet but he doesn’t let those words take root in his heart. he carries them gently in his hands, puts them down and lets the waves take them far away from him.)
when it comes to love, jeonghan thinks he’s always afraid; that he’s too much. that he is giving too little—afraid of not being enough.
eventually, the word love became too heavy for him to carry.
“do you wanna go watch the sea?” wonwoo asks after they finish eating.
jeonghan doesn’t say no.
they say the water remembers. when jeonghan lets the first of the many waves gather at his feet, he is back to that day. he turns to look at wonwoo a little far away watching him.
suddenly wonwoo is that sixteen year old boy from years ago. with his knees drawn closer to his chest, he smiles at jeonghan, his eyes sad. even when he doesn’t say anything, jeonghan hears the waves.
[FILL] 겨우 (barely)
Major Tags: N/A
Additional Tags: unrequited love, being on the other side of it, childhood friends, mentions of past relationships, ambiguous ending.
Permission to remix: Yes
***
“don’t take me home,” jeonghan says from the backseat. he doesn’t know why he had called wonwoo in the first place. he should have taken the bus home, ordered some chinese food and slept the day off. like it was any other day.
wonwoo meets his eyes through the rear view mirror for a brief moment, asking why without asking. why did you leave work early? are you okay? what did you need me for?
jeonghan wants to close his eyes and sleep this away. he wants to go back to his office and take the invitation he left there on purpose. “seungcheol is getting married next month.”
there he said it. a name he hasn’t spoken for the past two years. the world doesn’t fall silent like he had imagined. but that doesn’t mean he isn’t affected. it’s like a ghost that had been sleeping for a long time had woken up and he remembers all the haunting.
wonwoo looks at him once again, quick and studying. “oh,” is all he says.
jeonghan closes his eyes and buries himself into the seat. “anywhere. it doesn’t matter. i don’t want to be home now.”
in his dream, he sees mingyu, a shattered plate on the floor, his fingers bleeding. then there is seungcheol, raised voices and slamming doors. he hears wonwoo calling his name.
when he wakes up, he finds himself three hours away from home. in gongjin. where the ocean waves sound like i like you, i like you, i like you.
the first thing jeonghan realizes is that he’s hungry. he doesn’t remember eating anything apart from the sandwich he shared with seokmin that morning. wonwoo drives them to the seafood restaurant that jeonghan likes.
jeonghan orders maeuntang for him and ramyeon for wonwoo because boy can’t even stand the fishy smell let alone eat something fish. “we could have eaten somewhere else.”
wonwoo pours water in a glass and pushes it towards jeonghan. “you loved their maeuntang last time we came here.”
the second thing jeonghan realizes is that seungcheol is somewhere at the back of his head. he isn’t going to vanish anytime soon. but with wonwoo in front of him, it doesn’t feel like his world is about to end tomorrow.
jeonghan looks out at the sea through the glass windows. it’s beautiful as he remembers it, the sun bleeding gold over the waters. it’s calming and daunting at the same time. the last time they were both here, wonwoo almost drowned in the very same place.
“i am sorry about the last time,” jeonghan says.
wonwoo turns to look out at the sea. to see what jeonghan is on about. he stays quiet for a couple of minutes. “aren’t you like, eight years late?” there is a small smile when wonwoo looks back at him and jeonghan takes it, lets himself relax in that familiarity.
at eighteen, jeonghan learns nothing good ever comes from playing pranks.
wonwoo isn’t the one to get fooled by his antics. he has known jeonghan long enough to see through jeonghan’s lies. one time when jeonghan falls into the water purposely to deceive wonwoo into thinking he’s drowning, jeonghan expects him to call him out from above. in case he really falls for it, to cry for help because he can’t swim.
wonwoo calls his name once, in panic. then the next thing jeonghan hears is the loud splash of water and the rest of the events are blurry in his memory. he doesn’t remember how he brings a passed-out wonwoo to the shore nor does he remember how much time it takes for wonwoo to gain consciousness. even when wonwoo wakes up, he doesn’t meet jeonghan’s eyes.
at some point, jeonghan holds back his tears because wonwoo is supposed to be the smart one between them, he shouldn’t have jumped into the water because something worse could have happened, he should have known that it was a prank—
“since when were you this gullible?” jeonghan turns to him, glaring, “even if i was really drowning, you can't jump into the water like that. this isn't a movie, wonwoo.”
jeonghan is being too much, he knows. if anyone should be mad and yelling, it should be wonwoo. jeonghan is the one responsible for wonwoo almost dying. but jeonghan is the one angry and asking questions because what fool believes him?
wonwoo, who is now curled up, knees drawn closer to his chest, looks down at the sand. his face doesn’t look like he’s mad anymore. that’s wonwoo, he doesn’t stay mad for more than fifteen minutes.
“i was scared. i didn’t think at all,” wonwoo’s voice shakes a little. he must be still in shock and jeonghan feels so bad. they don’t say anything for a while because jeonghan lets what happened to sink in and wonwoo looks like he has more to say. then wonwoo looks up at jeonghan, meeting his eyes and says something with a sad smile, in a very quiet voice. jeonghan almost doesn’t hear it over the sound of waves crashing behind him.
(he hears it clearly even in its quiet but he doesn’t let those words take root in his heart. he carries them gently in his hands, puts them down and lets the waves take them far away from him.)
when it comes to love, jeonghan thinks he’s always afraid; that he’s too much. that he is giving too little—afraid of not being enough.
eventually, the word love became too heavy for him to carry.
“do you wanna go watch the sea?” wonwoo asks after they finish eating.
jeonghan doesn’t say no.
they say the water remembers. when jeonghan lets the first of the many waves gather at his feet, he is back to that day. he turns to look at wonwoo a little far away watching him.
suddenly wonwoo is that sixteen year old boy from years ago. with his knees drawn closer to his chest, he smiles at jeonghan, his eyes sad. even when he doesn’t say anything, jeonghan hears the waves.
i like you.
i like you, hyung.